123. Framing

If there is any psychoeducation, that I love most, it is the idea of framing and re-framing. I love stories about how humans can change perspectives almost as quickly as they blink, with the smallest amount of intention.

Meet Opal. She is my 4-year-old niece. While she hasn't yet developed a firm self-concept or worldview yet, I believe hers will be a positive one. I recently got to spend two nights and a couple of days with her, and I got to watch her frame and re-frame things many times. While much of this had to be prompted by me, it just took small prompts to change her thinking. Some of the precious things I heard and some of the re-framing we did...

"I don't weawy wike pending time witt you". The conversation that ensued was that she liked spending time with me BUT she really doesn't like long hikes. She just likes short ones. And she was worried about going on a long one. As soon as I committed to no long hikes, she liked me again. Geez, I wish adults were this simple.

"I miss my Mom." Yeah, I miss my Mom too. But if we never leave home, we don't get to do new things and make new memories like being with cousin-Stella for the weekend.

"You taid we would make tocotip tookies. And we dint." You are right. We didn't make chocolate chip cookies, but we got ice=cream and you really liked it.

There is a good chance that today, at some point, you will encounter a person, a situation, decision or perhaps even some weather that you don't like. I encourage you ask yourself a couple of fun question...

• If I were a kid, what could make this better?

• What would this look like if this were happening FOR me and not TO me?

• What's one thing I might laugh about in one year as I look back at this time in my life?

• If this situation were a casserole, what would you name it?

• Picture your 80-year-old-self rocking on a beautiful front porch somewhere, what would she/he say to you?

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